Breathe of Love (Day 115)

This week, I dedicate myself to losing myself in the Breathe of Love.

Breathing in, I open the cup of my heart like a flower turned up toward the sun. I pull my heart up into All Love Everywhere.

Breathing out, I pour Love, Light, Energy, Bliss, back down into my body, cells, atoms, and deeper - revealing to me the transparency of body and the true reality of who I am.

This week, I dedicate myself to taking these breaths - as many as I possibly can throughout the day and night. I pull my heart up into the Limitless Being of who I am with each deep breath in, and I shower myself with unconditional Love with each breath out.

Starting now: One full week of continuous LOVE-BREATHING.

beautiful, tear invoking session

Nice.

That was wonderful. I just transmitted the Love into this Exchange, and into the hearts and minds of all contained here. I could really feel the Love flowing through my heart and hands this time. The tears are all the proof I need that the Love is reaching everyone in this book.

I am writing a "Receiving Divine Love" whispering affirmation audio. In this audio, affirmations are recorded as whispers, and they are designed to allow the listener to deeply decide and consent to receive the Love, Energy, and Light flowing through this Exchange. To let ourselves be Loved unconditionally - that I think is the most powerful thing we can do.

There is so much Love that the Divine is pouring into us. It is up to us to allow that in. And it is this Love that I ask to flow through my hands - not the energy of this body and mind - but the Energy of Divine Love - but the Universal Transcendent, Transpersonal that I ask to flow through me.

I feel an enormous well of clear enthusiastic light pouring forth.

And I am grateful.

Long break - I am back and...

So is my enthusiasm for this Exchange.

It has been awhile since I have reported in. It is now day 105, and I still have not missed a day this year. I am ecstatic about that. Every day, I have held this Exchange between my Hands of Love, and every day I have communicated the Divine Energy to all contained here.

For the past few weeks, I have gone through a period of frustration and discouragement around this whole process. Thoughts of giving up, closing down the blog, putting the book away, came into my mind more than once. I am glad I hung in there, because now I feel absolutely fantastic about what I am doing.

I own nothing

I just had a great session of transmitting Universal Love, and I am feeling myself embark upon a deep, internal study of abundance and money. It seems that everyone has either negative or positive connotations around money. They either hate it, or grope after it like Schmeigel in the Lord of the Rings going after the ring.

I am realizing that I own nothing. Yeah, I make money. I put it in the bank for a little while. Then I give it away to others. I may collect a savings account, and collect this amount of money or that amount of money. But in the end - in the short dash - in the lightning strike that I am on this earth - I take no money with me. No money is put in my casket when I die. It all goes away from me in the end anyway.

SO... I am going to start developing a deep, intuitive, inner renouncement of money. I own nothing. I keep nothing. I am merely an empty vessel. A river bed through which abundance flows for the benefit of my family, community, and the world. I want to develop a detachment, a letting-go, a release around receiving money and around giving money. It comes to me freely. It leaves me freely. I don't push it away. I don't hoard it.

In this way, I think I can allow more abundance to flow to me, and through me.

Churn the butter of Love

Divine Mother
Universe
God
Beloved
The smile behind
the particles and waves of
this Sacred Universe...

I pray, screaming in ecstatic agony
that You feel this Love that I pour
through
these empty hands
this open heart.

In my life, I have collected worries
anxieties
fears
traumas...

I want to much to escape
this lake of uncertainty that my little
boat floats upon
pushed around by the waves of stress
and time.

I want so much to disappear into the light
gushing with pure ecstatic bliss
through this flimsy transparent dream
body.

I want to know that this Universal Energy
this Love
this Divine Bliss
is making a difference in the lives
of all I send this Love to...

Again I say:
most of all,
it is You - behind the faces of all
behind the smiles of all
within the tears of all
beating in the heart of all

it is You...
that I pray will feel this Love.

Inwardly I churn my heart
higher and higher,
more and more intensity,
my hands shaking,
tears streaming,
please, disappear,

please human dream body
disappear

reveal the light you are hiding...

and may You,
the smiling center of mystery

may You feel this Love
and may I feel that You
have received the shattered atoms
and cells of

this Love

Divine.

no more numbers

Okay, I think I am going to stop just numbering the days. Every now and then, I may look at a calendar and see what day I am on, just for fun. Instead, I am just operating under the assumption that I am not going to miss a day of transmitting Universal Love for the period of January 1, 2010 through January 1, 2022. That's my goal and I am sticking with it.'

81

Oh sweet Universe
I know your in there
in here

in the palms of these hands
in these cells, these atoms

deeper down

deeper down

all the way - I know You are in here.

I breathe my heart, my soul
open to You

and I witness You unfold in the palms
of my hands.

Galaxies,
Suns,
Moons,
Planets,
Endless Light,

is in here.

You unfold, and I pray,
the prayer that a river prays
as it dances down the landscape of dreams.

I pray that all will feel and will soak up
and will benefit

from the dance of this
water
Divine.

79

Spiritual questions

Is it possible for a question to spark, nurture, and help stir the awakening of our souls, our love, our native beingness?

For the past two years, I have written, re-written, and tweaked a set of 108 spiritual, meditative questions designed to help us awaken. And as of the last few days, I am feeling how much they are a part of this Exchange. I have been asking them, deeply reflecting them, and releasing them into my mind and body for the past few days, and I am about to start an official 108 day journey of asking them every single day.

There are 5 audios in all, and the 108 questions take about 9 minutes and 37 seconds to be asked. In meditations 1 and 2, they are repeated rapidly, one after the other, so that if you listen and repeat each question back to yourself, the next question will begin before you have had a chance to repeat it. It overlaps for this reason: the conscious mind gets tired because it wants to be in control, and as it is trying to repeat one question, and the next one begins, it goes back and forth between the two. This soon causes it to loosen its grip and relax, which allows the listener to sink into a deep and delicious, relaxed and wonderful state of mind.

In meditations 3 and 4, they are delivered into each hemisphere, each ear, in random order. It sounds like two sets of different questions, but they are the same list of 108 questions, but spoken in random order. This allows both hemispheres, and the intelligence and resources within each, to harmonize and go into a deep and transcendent state of mind and body.

Meditation 5 is semi-subliminal. You can barely hear the questions spoken, but they are mostly inaudible.

Finally, all the questions are saturated with Divine Energy/Love every day - so that as you absorb them, you are also soaking up this Energy into your cells, atoms, mind and heart.

The ultimate goal of these questions is to point the consciousness to that place beyond all thought, all time, all form, all dimension - so that we can live in the effortless grace of our divine beings.

More later...

74

All people in pain, please receive this Love flowing through my heart, hands - and through the heart and hands of all beings of light. It is time to end the suffering on this planet, and Love is the only medicine that can heal the wounds of loneliness, pain, and suffering.

I have gone through a lot of purging of anxiety, craziness, and general feelings of internal chaos this weekend. I am feeling much better. Yesterday was hard because I have been not getting enough sleep due to our new puppy that is sleeping in the room with Christine and I.

On my way to drop my two beautiful boys off at camp, this thought came to me:

Nothing UNREAL can ever be protected.
Nothing REAL can ever be harmed.
Love is REAL. Everything else is the grand dance of illusion.

69

I just had a great session of sending the Universal Love.

I am settling into a nice habit, a nice groove, a nice rhythm in doing my spiritual practices every day. I am feeling a sense of chaos, a sense of change, a sense of transformation lately. Locally, our kids elementary school almost closed, but ultimately didn't. After going to all those school board meetings, all those school board forum meetings, two public marches/gatherings - I have come to have a deeper love, respect, appreciation for my neighbors and friends. They are all such wonderful people, and I am proud to be a member of this community.

Anyway - all is well in LOVE SEND LAND!

61

I surrender my heart
mind
body
soul

to

L
O
V
E

59

Checking in...

It is now day 59 of this long journey of 1) quantumly transmitting Universal Love through my hands for at least 12 minutes every day in a row for 4,380 days (12 years), and 2) doing my esoteric breaths twice a day (from my own spiritual tradition) So far, I am ecstatic to say that I have made it. I am very grateful. Every day, I do three small meditations. In the morning, I do my light-breaths. Around noon or mid-afternoon, I transmit the Universal Energy, and in the late afternoon I do my light-breaths again. It is working well. I feel it is a solid habit now.

My prayer is that this Love is making a difference, and that I will let-go of being the "doer" and simply be the transparent window through which it flows....

Other things...

I have made a commitment to exercise for the next 90 days to get this body into better shape. It is week one of that endeavor. It involves 3 days a week of weights, push-ups and squats, and 3 days a week of cardio. SO FAR, I am feeling fantastic and strong. I think it is because of everything I am doing, plus the fact that I am using progesterone cream on my skin every night. I had heard that this natural hormone cream helps to raise DHEA levels in the blood. Whatever it does, I am not feeling sore the next day after intense workouts. I feel strong, bouncy, supple, just like I am in my 20's! In the summer of 2008, I tried this same regimen, and I was completely wiped out for days after each session with the weights. And now - I am not! Which is really making me happy, which brings me to this point: I believe that if we keep our bodies healthy and strong, we are more able to sense, feel, and direct life-energy, and we are more able to "see through" our bodies and realize their ultimate transparency.

Joining the Good News Gazette for 40 days....

The Good News Gazette will begin a 40 day program of holding the entire country and all our politicians from all spectrums of left and right in a field of compassion and love, beginning March 1, 2010. Here is my prayer:

I pray that all the love, deep in the core of each politician, each american, will unite for the best, the highest, and the greatest good of everyone in the United States and everyone in the world. I hold this political system in a field of love, I hold each person, each politician in this field of love, and I pray for the transmutation of fear, anger, hate - into genuine feelings of compassion, understanding, forgiveness, and love.

For more information about this 40 day event, click here

24 hours of AUM/OM

Today, I have decided to chant OM in every waking and dreaming moment, for 24 hours. May I chant, and may I feel, vibrate, and transmit this Universal Sound, on every level of my conscious, subconscious, and superconscious mind for the next 24 hours. May every cell join in the chorus of OM, my every atom, my every subatomic wave and particle of energy join in this ecstatic OM.....

50

For fifty days in a row, these hands have endeavored to be empty vessels through which the love of the whole universe can flow. I just experienced a wonderful session just now. With each deep breath, I imagined my heart opening and merging with the stars and galaxies of love - and with each exhaling breath, I inwardly let-go of my hands. I allowed the love to flow through them like light through a prism.

I am
grateful

for this beautiful flow
of love

beyond and in all moments
of time.

47

I just experienced a wonderful session of Universal Love crashing and flooding through my heart and hands. Love is the sole purpose of my existence. May all feel and benefit from this Love that flows silently AND invisibly and ecstatically through me.

May this body
disappear

And Love
take its place.

45

Breakthrough

For the past few days, I have been asking myself 108 deep, profound, spiritual questions that I have been writing and re-writing, and perfecting for the past year or so. I read through them in a deeply relaxed way this morning. A few minutes later, before I was to leave for the Sunday meditation service, I was looking on the internet at how Vice President Biden was verbally sparring with Dr. Evil, better known as former Vice President Dick Cheney. (half-way kidding about the Dr. Evil part). I mentioned it to Christine, and she wondered aloud why a former Vice President would attack a sitting president, and how "out of decorum" that was. Once she said that, I said, "well, that is just the way he is."

Then something deep and profound shifted in me. I loosened. Relaxed. I let-go. I felt myself shift back to a place of total acceptance. That's just the way Cheney is. Then this thought hit me a little while later:

It is what it is. Nothing can be done about it on the physical level that it appears to exist.

The whole point of "Cheney energy" is to draw me into the false belief that this world is really real. When I get mad, fume, fuss - and call him names - I get madder - and that is just what the energies of greed and anger want. The ego wants us to get angry - angry people feed off of people getting angry at them. They want, they need, they crave more anger.

For the first time in many years, I am not angry at Cheney. He just is. When I step back, relax, let-go, and allow him to just be what he is - then I am not emotionally drawn into the anger. I feel an openness, a freedom, a joy that tells me: the world, its illusions and problems, its wars and injustice, is not really real. It is a fiction, a slight of hand, a magic trick. My job is to learn compassion, love, understanding - and my ultimate job is to let-go, to transcend, to be who I am. To not be drawn into the drama of world events.

This brings me back to a John Grisham book I read, called The Appeal. (Spoiler alert!) In this book, the forces of greed and arrogance win. After reading feverishly through the book, I get to the end, and the bad guys win. I was disappointed, I felt robbed of all the time I spent racing to the end of the book, but there is a lesson here:

It is what it is. Nothing can be done about it on the physical level that it appears to exist.

If I get into the ring with the greedy corporations that have purchased our politicians and devour the earth and any human beings that get in their way - and I try and fight them on the level of their physical reality - I will lose every time. I am really getting it when Einstein said that the world's problems cannot be solved on the same level of consciousness that created them.

The world cannot be changed on the level of consciousness where the world exists. More specifically, I am not here to change the world, but to expand and heighten and transform my consciousness. To change the world, I believe we need to go to the causal level of consciousness and heal our own personal demons, our own greed, our own monstrousness, our own fear. To change the world, I believe we need to completely release the world, to let it go completely, to witness the world from our core spiritual consciousness as non-existent. Then the world will change gracefully before our eyes.

Or it won't.

And it doesn't matter - because - ultimately when the form of all we see passes from our sight, we will remain. Our consciousness, our souls, are eternal - and this play of light and sound - is a cosmic motion picture. We are the actors, and we are the audience.

40

I breathe in a circle.

Eyes closed, focused on the center of spiritual awareness between my eyebrows, slightly elevated.

Breathing in, I widen and expand the center of love in the middle of my spine, while also pulling it upward - to a place of consciousness beyond the body and beyond the conscious thinking mind. Merging with Universal Love

Breathing out, I pour that Love through my head, heart, hands - and into the pages of the Universal Life Force Energy Exchange - into all the beautiful smiling souls contained there - now - and all who will ever be contained there. I communicate Love through the Quantum Field - or Energy, Life-Force, whatever name is placed upon it. I communicate this Love and always, always endeavor to become nothing in this Love, no-thing, beyond all thoughts and all idea of being a body.

This is simple, but takes discipline.

Also, as I breathe in - slow and long - I imagine and intend that the curtains of my cells and atoms open up - allowing the magnificent Universe to peek through - and the Love - to shine through.

Revealing no body at all.

Today, let me keep this breathing rhythm up in every moment.

35

Emptiness reveals ~ Love beyond ~ form

As the gentle sunlight of Love begins to peek through the tiny doorways of my atoms, I let go, become empty, and allow this Love to flood through me. I am nothing. Let me be nothing. Let me realize the nothingness of this physical body so that I can discover who I am. Existence itself is a grand illusion. Time is a passing dream, nothing more. All these minutes, hours, days, deadlines, bills - all passing fancy to the soul. It is all entertainment.

I just transmitted the Universal Love: breathing deeply and continuously, I opened my heart and allowed it to ascend and expand on each inhaling breath - and I let go and allowed the Love to flood through me on each exhaling breath. I endeavor, each time, to disappear. May this Love wash away the mountains of my illusions just like water weathers the physical mountains - or better yet - may Universal Love swell like a light within the mountain - allowing it to dissolve from within.

Love is the nectar that dissolves the illusion that the physical human body is real - that these cars and roads and computers are real. To me, I am realizing that this body is merely a shell of atoms and cells - energy really - constructed by the mind for me to learn and grow and become the Love that I am.

Today, I felt my body melt into the consciousness of Love - and I felt the Love, like thousands of piercing lights - explode in ecstasy in all directions. I send this Love to the Earth, the soil, the plants, the animals, the people - all for the purpose of sending it deeper into the Divine - God - Goddess - The Great Comforter - contained within it all.

May all contained in these Reiki Pages of this book, feel and receive this Love - this Healing Life-Force Energy - for their ultimate benefit. I quantumly communicate this Love to all life on this Earth. May this body, this breath, finally reveal itself to me as nothing more than a window...

empty...

open....

space...

where pure Love - pure Light - can simply flow to benefit life.

34

My journey continues to deepen, expand, and to grow. I am grateful, that for 34 days, I have endeavored to extend Universal Energy through my heart and hands every day so far. I have been busy with my day job lately. And busy chanting the Lakshmi Mantra with wonderful results in prosperity and abundance.

Everything is already gone

So many times during the day I get a strong sense that everything is already gone. My body has already disintegrated. This house I live in, and raise these beautiful children in, and love this beautiful woman in, and get frustrated in, and laugh and cry in, and grow old in - has ALREADY fallen to the ground. Its the future. All of this is a memory of my soul. Just a memory. And the soul that I am - the Transcendent Self - is looking back upon these memories like looking into gentle waves ripping across a pond on a sunny day.

Ultimately, I believe that, and quantum physics is beginning to actually prove, nothing is actually really REAL. It's all a fantasy world, a holo-deck, a dream of our souls. The only thing that is real is the Love we choose to give unconditionally, the Love that we choose to allow ourselves to receive without restriction, and the Love that we ultimately realize, is who we are. This Love, this Energy, this Joy, this Quantum Soup - I am grateful to *send* to *communicate* to all contained in this dream pages of this dream book in this dream world.

Cleansing diet

For the next several weeks, I am eating 6 small, powerful meals a day - nothing on top and nothing in between. I am already feeling some clarity from it. I have always gotten a lot of growth, internal mostly, from the act of a cleansing diet. I shook Sky's hand this morning and told him I would eat these bars only for the next week. By shaking his hand, I really made the commitment - because he will really DIG IT IN if I fall off the cleansing diet wagon! I don't want to hear him teasing me, so I am sticking with it. I am loving the deeper feelings of energy and light and the deeper consciousness I feel already.

How is my consciousness growing?

Or, should I say, how am I disappearing? As I disappear in Love, I awaken in truth. My goal is to consciously choose to have my body disappear into Love - sounds nuts - probably too crazy for many. I am completely sane, honest I am! My point is this: In the deeper levels of reality, the body and all objects in the world are merely illusions that are constantly arising and disappearing from the depths of our consciousness. So my goal is to heighten my body's vibration to the point that it begins to reveal to me the flower of its non-existence.

I love Christine, Sorin, Liam, Sky, Prasad, Amelie and my boxer puppy Hanuman, Emily, Lakshmi our Chi, and Zeke and Gaia, our cats - with all my heart and all my soul.

I want to serve each member of this family - beginning with my wholehearted commitment to loving Christine more deeply, more powerfully, more spiritually. Our relationship is a flower that has weathered several storms and has grown more beautiful over these last 10 years. I remember, even before we met physically, after we hung up the phone from talking to each other, saying to myself "I am going to love her for the rest of my life."

And I am. I love you, Christine. In love, I am you. You are me. May we forever commune in the reality of our love - blossoming in the sight of the Great Mother of the Universe!!! I never knew, before we met, that I would ever have a chance to love someone over a long period of time. Now I do. And part of this long-term process is loving myself, completely and unconditionally - because as I do - I am loving you.

May all the Love I channel into this Exchange pour into our marriage and make our love grow stronger and more powerful every single day for the next 12 years!!